Andrea Askowitz

Author & Teacher

Blog

I’m a slow writer. I wanted to write better. I wanted to write faster. So, the year I turned 50, I wrote 50 essays in 50 weeks. (Gave me two weeks off.) TO READ THEM ALL, FOLLOW ME ON MEDIUM. I posted some of them here.

So Much Fun Teaching

I taught a class at CreativeLive.com. It was so much fun. They flew me out to Seattle, picked me up in a car, put me in a hotel. I had my own stylist! Hair and makeup! When one of the PAs asked me what kind of milk I wanted in my coffee, I totally blushed.

The class was another thing. I tried hard on this and I think I nailed it. This is everything I know about how to tell a story in 90 quick minutes. Watch it here:

Screen Shot 2018-02-23 at 5.27.45 PM

It’s Been So LONG

I always forget to update this blog and so, so much has changed. A year ago, I retired from Lip Service. It’s been a mix of emotions, I’m proud of my decision to move on. Lip Service was my identity for nine years, but I was ready. Now Lip Service is carrying on with the help of the Miami Book Fair. So it’s in good hands.

As for me, I’m the host and teacher of the podcast Writing Class Radio. Click that link for podcast episodes, daily writing prompts, craft talks, and everything fun about writing. I LOVE IT. A podcast is a radio show you can listen to at any time. On Writing Class Radio you’ll hear true, personal stories from the students in the class plus a little about how to write your own stories. It’s so good, really. You can listen directly from the website or download on your phone from iTunes and listen whenever/where ever you want. If you’ve never listened to a podcast, you are in for a wonderful, totally intimate, storytelling experience. ENJOY!

Screen Shot 2015-11-25 at 3.27.56 PM

I’m the Star of Strangers Podcast

The creator of The Moth Radio Hour, Lea Thau, created a podcast that’s just as good as The Moth.  She interviewed me and turned my life story into something interesting. She’s showing the changes in families in the U.S. in the last twenty years.  And she made me sound smart and funny.  This woman’s a skilled storyteller.  Also, the podcast is really well produced.

Click here on Strangers to listen.

Here’s a picture of me getting pregnant.  I’m lucky, most people don’t get good shots of conception.

image_preview

 

Teaching Memoir in Guatemala

Hey, looking for adventurous, open, awesome students for a week-long writing intensive in Guatemala!  One of my favorite writing teachers, Joyce Maynard, invited me to set up a satellite workshop alongside hers.  It’s an offer I couldn’t refuse:  a week in paradise, boxes of wine, yoga, massages, and an intense week of writing.

 
February 15-26, 2013.  $2,000, includes transportation to and from airport, food, lodging, and writing workshops.  Check out Write by Lake Atitlan for pictures and details.  Joyce’s prices are higher so don’t get scared.  If you’re interested, there are two spots left.  Email me at andrea@andreaaskowitz.com

Greatest Show on Earth

Lip Service is the greatest show on earth.  I know that line’s been taken, but I am reclaiming it for Lip Service.

We sold out AGAIN.  On a purely economic level, this means we should raise our ticket prices.  But we don’t want to. We want a bigger theater.

Check out our stories at www.lipservicestories.com.  Also you can download our podcast on itunes.  How cool is that?!  Here’s my latest story:


Listen to Snip n Drip here


Lip Service Kicked Ass Again

The last Lip Service (October 1, 2011) marked our 5th birthday.  It was the best show ever.  I always say that, but it just keeps getting better and better. This time I didn’t even tall a story, I was the host, which was fun, but nerve wracking.  You never get to rest as host.  Check out our stories at www.lipservicestories.com.

Into Me See

My story “Into Me See” is in Salon.com.  I took Victoria to a tantric sex retreat.  It was a preventative measure.  Click here to read.

Lip Service is Part of Out in the Tropics

Because we’re all a little queer.  Get tickets NOW.

 

Featured storytelles: Andrea Askowitz, Nick Garnett, Chris Gilbert, Lisa Merritt, Jeanne Panoff, Adriana Paramo, David Rosenberg, and Andrea Zarchin.  Show’s gonna be awesome.

08-Jun-nd_LIPS-4x6

Seven-Year-Old Logic

Last night Tashi asked me what my Lip Service story was about. I said, “It was about how I had one idea about Miami and Mami Vicky had another idea.”

 

She said, “What idea?”

 

I said, “Well, when I moved to Miami, I thought no one here would really care about who was gay.”

 

Tashi said, “We’re gay, right?”

 

I said, “Well, I’m gay, because I love another woman.”

 

She said, “Why would anyone care about that?”

 

I said, “I don’t know.  I really don’t know.”

Lip Service/Under the Sun was Like a Rock Concert

Last Saturday, Lip Service collaborated with WLRN’s Under the Sun and our show was like a rock concert.  Or like the musical Hair.  We got a standing ovation!  I thought the audience might rush the stage like they do at the end of Hair.  It was so much fun.

Here’s my story.

 

 

This story is about what I learned from Victoria, but I also want to say that Victoria has learned a lot from me. Three weeks ago, we were at a family gathering.  All of Victoria’s relatives were there and Victoria introduced me to all her old-lady relatives, to everyone, including a priest as her pareja. Pareja means spouse.  Victoria’s brother overheard her introduce me to the priest, pulled Victoria aside and said, “Why do you have to flaunt your sexuality?”

 

Victoria said, “She is my spouse.  Wouldn’t you introduce your spouse as your spouse?”

 

You can hear all the stories on our youtube site:  http://www.youtube.com/lipservicestories and go to Under the Sun to read stories, to learn more about the storytellers, and to learn about the most awesome local radio show, Under the Sun.

Lip Service is this Saturday

Lip Service is teaming up with Under the Sun for a night of true stories and a behind the scenes experience of the making of a radio show.  Gettickets now. This is our biggest and best Lip Service production ever.  We’re going to sell out.

 

Storytellers:  Andrea Askowitz, Terence Cantarella, Aaron Curtis, Maria De Los Angeles, Robert Foote, Jeremy Glazer, Allison Langer, Esther Martinez, and Brenda Mezick.

Lip Service is Going on the Radio!

FINAL LOGO (small file - cropped)Lip Service has teamed up with WLRN’s Under the Sun.  We’re taping the show for a live broadcast at the magnificentMiracle Theater.  So if you have a TRUE, personal story that tells us something about life in South Florida and you want to tell it in front of a live audience and a radio audience, send it to submissions@lipservicestories.com.

 

Show date:  April 23, 2011

 

Submission deadline:  April 1, 2011

 

Submissions can be attached as a Word document or pasted into the body of an email and sent to submissions@lipservicestories.com and must be fewer than 1,000 words.

Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

 

Thank you for parenting me.  As I remember, childhood was pretty good. You were attentive and sweet mostly and while I don’t remember making sculptures out of popsicle sticks or homemade Play-Doh, I do remember  getting lots of your attention.  How did you do it for so many years?

 

I am having trouble right now.  To be frank, Tashi is bugging the shit out of me.  And Sebastian is a monster.  But the real problem is how Tashi is always underfoot.  I remember this being a problem of yours too.  It is the one thing I remember us consistently fighting about.  You stepping on my toes.  It didn’t bother me, but I remember you getting a little hysterical sometimes, like when you would take a step onto my toes and then fall down.  Well, what goes around, comes around, as they say.  Tashi is just like me.  Somehow she manages to be always under my feet.  It’s hard when I’m wearing my platform flip-flops.

 

Oh, I know I shouldn’t complain.  I see how sad it makes you now-a-days when I don’t want to sit on your lap.  I saw it on Sunday, when you gave me that look and then patted your thighs and I said, “Oh Mom.”  But Mom, I can’t eat a meal without my little curly girl climbing on top of me.

 

And why did I think shopping for first-grade school supplies would be fun?  That fiasco was my own fault in so many ways.  First because I’ve raised a spoiled, rotten, persistent princess and second because I let myself get overly excited to get the supplies in the first place.  My elation came crashing down seven minutes into shopping when Tashi begged for the pretty pink scissors.  I agree, they were pretty, but I had already crossed scissors off the list because she has six pairs at home.  I said, “NO NEW SCISSORS!  You have six pairs at home.”  I felt strong for the first hour, but each time she begged I felt her wearing me down.  I stood strong though, thanks to you and all that I learned watching you fend me off all those years.  Still, it was exhausting and I don’t look forward to doing shopping for school supplies again next year or the next or the next.  I know, just eleven more years.

 

Another thing:  Why did I think bike riding with a 6 1/2 year-old would be fun?  It’s not.  We had fun though, you and I, didn’t we, when I’d jog and you’d ride next to me and we’d talk?  Well, I’ve been trying to replicate those good times.  Today, when we rode to camp because I crashed the van into a parked Jaguar and now it’s in the shop, I said, “Right turn!”  Tashi screamed, “Why are you always talking about bike stuff?” I said, “Bike stuff? I’m just telling you which way to turn.”  My point is, she was being a bitch for no reason.  And she was swerving into traffic.

 

She’s tired, I know.  She slept in bed with me last night because Victoria’s out of town and also because there was a big spider in her room, which was no Daddy Long Legs.  I killed it and then took it’s picture and we looked it up on the Internet.

photo-8

Can’t say exactly what kind it was because I’m no arachno-specialist, but it was brown and hairy with a very big butt.  Also, Tashi didn’t sleep that well on account of it being crowded and with Beast breathing in our faces all night.  He gets protective when Victoria’s not around.  So I should have some compassion.  I remember how I could never fall asleep because it was so much fun being in your bed with you and Chaucer whenever Dad had poker night.

 

I know I should quit my bitching.  It wasn’t that bad sharpening all 48 pencils and putting Tashi’s name on them with the Sharpie.  She did a bunch of them herself and only cried twice because she messed up and couldn’t erase.  For some reason she thought her initials were N-H.  When I asked how she got that she said, “Nataaaasha.”  And it’s okay that I didn’t get to read the New York Times last night because I had to turn the light off for her.  And we did make it to camp safely, although we were an hour and a half late and I didn’t get to work until noon.  No big deal. I’m just writing to say that I like being a parent.  It’s the parenting that’s annoying.  I appreciate you doing it for me.  Thanks Mom.

 

Love,

Andrea

Mama Bear

Look what Victoria did when Sebastian got his leg caught in the crib.  She doesn’t even know Karate.

photo-5

Subscribe!!

Subscribe!